Without history, we have only ignorance

(The Daily Telegraph)

Photo: MichaelOlsen/ZorkMagazine

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Without history, we have only ignorance = Hi! With royalty, we've enough in cartoons!


Without history, we have only ignorance = O! With nation's rich royalty, we've enough.

(by Maurice Goddard)

Floodwaters surge as Tropical Storm Irene lashes Northeast

(CNN)

Photo: Fuser-Invent

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Floodwaters surge as Tropical Storm Irene lashes Northeast = Terrific ogre's ultra powers, lashed Manhattan to sore losses.

(by Maurice Goddard)

Astronomers discover planet made of diamond

(Reuters)

Photo: nata2

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Astronomers discover planet made of diamond = Report'd an odd marvel: a fine stone amid cosmos!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Hurricane Irene hits North Carolina hard with wind and rain

(NBC-17)

Photo: US Navy

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The Hurricane Irene = Her ire can ruin thee

(by Aronas Pinchas)

The Power of Mind Over Body

(eHow)

Photo: alles-schlumpf

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The Power of Mind Over Body = Drove my refined top. Oh! Bow.

(by Maurice Goddard)

Russia Plans Hotel for Space Tourists

(NTD Television)

Photo: Sweetie187

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The Russian space hotel = Is such plan to see Earth

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Russians tout plans to launch space hotel by 2016

(MSNBC)

Photo: NASA

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Far out! Ruskies debut a new space hotel biz. model. = Sputnik Doubletree? HA! Orbitz.com due a few sales.

(by Brad Blue)

Human guinea pigs lend their courage to a golden era of cancer research

(The Guardian)

Photo: Novartis AG

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Human guinea pigs lend their courage to a golden era of cancer research = Engage on a trial and error search, in a 'one gulf hope' a cure might succeed?

(by Maurice Goddard)

Chilling moment hooded thugs shot at police helicopter during Birmingham riots

(Daily Mail)

Photo: rorymizen

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Chilling moment hooded thugs shot at police helicopter during Birmingham riots = Hit? Oh! God! Chance in a million thud tremor plight! Moronic buggers missed the pilot!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Sally Bercow favourite to be evicted from Celebrity Big Brother

(Metro)

Photo: Beacon Radio

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Sally Bercow favourite to be evicted from Celebrity Big Brother = Boy! Flabby charmer OUT! Electrified TV viewers gobble erotic rot!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Why the heck is NASA studying alien invasion scenarios?

(Houston Chronicle)

Photo: angelferd

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Why the heck is NASA studying alien invasion scenarios? = Shy an idea? Any invoking circles in wheat astonishes us!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Diamond particles discovered in candlelight

(The Daily Telegraph)

Photo: Rickydavid

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Diamond particles discovered in candlelight = Lord! A candescent, odd, empirical light's divine?

(by Maurice Goddard)

Normandy Beach Faces New Invasion ... Of Wind Turbines

(Fox News)

Photo: thebarrowboy

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Normandy Beach Faces New Invasion ... Of Wind Turbines = Bran-new offensive win on D-Day's beach is unromantic!

(by Maurice Goddard)

German left provokes row on Berlin Wall anniversary

(The Guardian)

Photo: NatalieMaynor

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The Berlin Wall aniversary = Ah, all liberty winners rave!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Libya shows signs of slipping from Muammar Gaddafi's grasp

(The Guardian)

Photo: Illustration: People's Open Graphics

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Libya shows signs of slipping from Muammar Gaddafi's grasp = A bad pig "Piss off!" summons warms! Pray, a grim dog's fall is nigh!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Gold devotees say they saw all of this coming

(MSNBC)

Photo: digitalmoneyworld

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Gold devotees say they saw all of this coming = Addicts high on soft yellow metal: "Yes, go save!"

(by Steve Allison)

Jodie Foster helps in search for alien civilizations

(Christian Science Monitor)

Photo: Alan Light

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Jodie Foster helps in search for alien civilizations = Far echo is...? Or...? Oi! SETI project finds Nazis alive in Hell!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Utøya shootings: Breivik accompanies police on eight-hour reconstruction

(The Guardian)

Photo: lwpkommunikacio

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The Utoya shooting = O, I shot at the young!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Hedgehogs could be extinct in fifteen years, warns zoologist Dr Toni Bunnell

(Metro)

Photo: DirtBikeDBA (Mike)

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Hedgehogs could be extinct in fifteen years, warns zoologist Dr Toni Bunnell = Breeding is not excellent. But highway toll of dozens a second runs into grief!!

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Hedgehogs could be extinct in fifteen years, warns zoologist Dr Toni Bunnell = Cunning sign to fill the freezer box now? They're good to eat and bliss unsliced!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Money really can't buy love: Spanish duchess gives away fortune in order to marry commoner

(Daily Mail)

Photo: Octavio Aceves

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Maria del Rosario Cayetana Alfonsa Victoria Eugenia Francisca Fitz-James Stuart y de Silva = O! A darn crazy name! Savour a jovial nasal disaster, a farcical farce? If I say it, it tongue ties me!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Back from the brink: Rare ladybird spiders reintroduced into UK countryside

(Daily Mail)

Photo: Pen Araneae

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Back from the brink: Rare ladybird spiders reintroduced into UK countryside = Bio: By rarer luck it bred! Odd red arachnid returns to prey in dusk's nick of time!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Sexually Showy Male Birds Finish Early

(National Geographic)

Photo: Frank.Vassen

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Sexually showy male birds finish early = Waxbill hen (sadly): "My sir, you are selfish!"

(by Dharam Khalsa)

TV review: Sperm Whale: Inside Nature's Giants

(The Guardian)

Photo: flickkerphotos

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TV review: Sperm Whale: Inside Nature's Giants = In maps, viewers 'enter' Leviathan's weird guts!

(by Maurice Goddard)

England riots: Are brooms the symbol of the resistance?

(BBC)

Photo: edufiend.com

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England riots: Are brooms the symbol of the resistance? = Sense, brother! Sane locals arm to defy the rioting mobs!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Rudderless Met crippled by liberalism

(Daily Mail)

Photo: Steve Punter

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The Metropolitan Police Service = Teach people: Violent riots - crime!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Mankind isn't the only altruistic species... chimps have a heart too

(Daily Mail)

Photo: Tambako the Jaguar

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Mankind isn't the only altruistic species... chimps have a heart too = It's civil! It's they care more than sick human apes do on this planet!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Tottenham riot: Did police get their tactics right?

(BBC)

Photo: Metropolitan Police

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The Metropolitan Police Service = Coppers voice a line: "Let them riot."

(by Tony Crafter)

Bachmann Newsweek Cover Goes for Insult But Gets Criticism in Return

(Fox News)

Image: Newsweek

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Bachmann Newsweek Cover Goes for Insult But Gets Criticism in Return = 'Stateswomanlike' feminist crows in crunching revenge to curb brutes!!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Divine dispatches: a religion roundup

(The Guardian)

Photo: alykat

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Divine dispatches: a religion roundup = An invalid Pope rued sin: "Hi God! Curse it!"

Photo: CREDITS

Divine dispatches: a religion roundup = Vatican: In urge, old Pope did rue his sin.

(by Maurice Goddard)

London riots force England match to be cancelled

(The Sun)

Photo: Carole Soulas

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The London riots = Not this one, Lord!

(by Adie Pena)

'White Mouse' used sass to outsmart the Nazi regime

(Sydney Morning Herald)


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'White Mouse' used sass to outsmart the Nazi regime = So thus I see, wartime heroine's utmost guts amazed!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Regular exercise good for cancer patients and survivors

(The Daily Telegraph)

Photo: sanchom

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Regular exercise good for cancer patients and survivors = Advice? Never fear, sir! Go! Don't relax! Run! Soccer! Go up stairs!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Is America Ready for 'George W. Bush on Steroids'?

(The Atlantic)

Photo: Gov. Rick Perry

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Is America Ready for 'George W. Bush on Steroids'? = So foreboding? Smart guy here is a rowdier case!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Libya rebels deny losing hold on Bir al-Ghanam

(The Daily Star)

Photo: BRQ Network

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Libya rebels deny losing hold on Bir al-Ghanam = Baldly lies - Arabs blindly hang on home region

(by Aronas Pinchas)

For NASA, Return Trip to Jupiter in Search of Clues to Solar System's Origins

(The New York Times)

Photo: horstm42

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For NASA, Return Trip to Jupiter in Search of Clues to Solar System's Origins = O! Proper or not, Creation's so far-flung rich mysteries, just tantalise us, sir!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Polar bear camp was 'perilous' place to put up camp, says wildlife film-maker

(The Daily Mirror)

Photo: ucumari

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Polar bear camp was 'perilous' place to put up camp, says wildlife film-maker = Epic weak flaw, pal! Campers simply plumped for trouble as a calamitous RIP!

(by Maurice Goddard)

30 Americans Killed as Taliban Shoot Down a Copter

(The New York Times)

Photo: Eleventh Earl of Mar

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30 Americans Killed as Taliban Shoot Down a Copter = 30 more dead's a lot, in a blank, chaotic, pointless war.

(by Maurice Goddard)

Cinemania > Captain America: The First Avenger

(Shore News Today)

Photo: JD Hancock

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Captain America = A Cinema? It a crap!

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Perry Leads Prayer Rally for 'Nation in Crisis'

(The New York Times)

Photo: DonkeyHotey

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Perry Leads Prayer Rally for 'Nation in Crisis' = Pray? Lord! Fella's a sorry sinner! A crier in pity!

(by Maurice Goddard)

The Crested Rat

(Daily Mail)

Photo: Joachim S. Müller

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The African crested rat (Lophiomys imhausi) = A critter has made his fur poison, they claim!

(by David Bourke)

Paul McCartney: 'Apparently, I have been hacked'

(Los Angeles Times)

Illustration: SimonaHelloStranger

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Paul McCartney: 'Apparently, I have been hacked' = ""Privacy cheek by a nut appalled me! Hence a rant!"

(by Maurice Goddard)

Dieting makes your brain cells eat themselves

(Los Angeles Times)

Photo: petekraynak

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Dieting makes your brain cells eat themselves = Get this - my bulk increased to raise Mensa level!

(by Dharam Khalsa)

Whatever George Osborne believes, Britain will spend years in the doldrums

(The Daily Telegraph)

Photo: HM Treasury

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Whatever George Osborne believes, Britain will spend years in the doldrums = "Believe, sir? A depression's due to Blair-Brown's greedy Whitehall government!"

(by Maurice Goddard)

The Nation: A Heavy Hearted Deal

(National Public Radio)

Photo: Sergiocapitano

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Heavy Hearted Deal = A very hated deal, eh?

(by Aronas Pinchas)

Oh Please, Let Sarah Palin Run for President!

(The Invisible Library)

Photo: smiteme

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Oh Please, Let Sarah Palin Run for President! = In's a real dense popular parrot in the flesh!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Sarah Palin On Joe Biden: "Appalling" And "Vile"

(Weasel Zippers)

Photo: Lord Mariser

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Sarah Palin On Joe Biden: "Appalling" And "Vile"... = Papa Biden on Palin: "As a jingo-hen, all drivel!"

(by Maurice Goddard)

African crested rat uses poison trick to foil predators

(BBC)

Photo: Joachim S. Müller

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African crested rat uses poison trick to foil predators = One practical rodent spikes fur coat for to resist raids

(by Chris Sturdy)

Palin's Alaska hair salon gets own reality show

(MSNBC)

Photo: xomiele

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Palin's Alaska hair salon gets own reality show = Like a loony wig nest, all Sarah's hair wants soap!

(by Maurice Goddard)

Neanderthals' Extinction Due to Modern Human Invasion

(Internet News and Views)

Photo: hairymuseummatt

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Neanderthals' Extinction Due to Modern Human Invasion = Ah! Thus ran ancient man's evolution. Odd none intermixed?

(by Maurice Goddard)

Apple has more cash than the U.S. Treasury

(Los Angeles Times)

Photo: procsilas

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Apple has more cash than the U.S. Treasury = Hurt at heart, Uncle Sam hopes... as he prays...

(by Maurice Goddard)