Wordsmith.org: The Magic of Words

Monday, November 29, 2010

Microsoft Recruits Santa for Free-Photos Program

(The New York Times)
A child from Sasebo's Omura Kodomo Children's Home carries his gift from Santa Claus during a community relations project at at Hario Chapel on Fleet Activities Sasebo, Japan, Dec. 6, 2008. (U.S. Navy photo by Mass Communication Specialist 2nd Class Joshua J. Wahl/Released) (Edisto Images)

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Microsoft Recruits Santa for Free-Photos Program = O! Mirth! Cute force of gross airport Santas perform!
(by Maurice Goddard)

Prince William: Let my father become King

(The Daily Telegraph)
WINDSOR, ENGLAND - JUNE 15:  (R-L) Prince William, Prince Charles, Prince of Wales and Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall  leave St Georges's Chapel after attending the Garter Ceremony on June 15, 2009 in Windsor, England. The Order of the Garter is the senior and oldest British Order of Chivalry, founded by Edward III in 1348. Membership in the order is limited to the sovereign, the Prince of Wales, and no more than twenty-four members. (Photo by Chris Jackson/WPA Pool/Getty Images)
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Prince William: Let my father become King = Mommy will benefit - pick Charlie a regent!
(by Aronas Pinchas)

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Prince William: Let my father become King = Permit no mercy! Feeble king with Camilla!
(by Maurice Goddard)

Bomb Kills Iranian Nuclear Scientist

(The New York Times)
A worker rides his bike past the Bushehr nuclear power plant on October 26, 2010 as Iran began to load fuel into the core of its first atomic power plant some 745 miles south of Tehran. The Russian-built power plant is supervised by the United Nation's nuclear agency.    UPI/Mehr News Agency/Majid Asgarpour Photo via Newscom

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Majid Shahriari = Ah, sir, I arm jihad!
(by Aronas Pinchas)

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Emma Watson fears her wealth will put off men

(The Daily Telegraph)
Celebrities attend the Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows, Part 1 premiere on November 15, 2010 held at Alice Tully Hall in New York City, New York.  Among those in attendance: Emma Watson  Fame Pictures, Inc - Santa Monica, CA, USA - +1

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Emma Watson fears her wealth will put off men = Female with power's fun? What all men fear most!
(by Maurice Goddard)

Being fat aged nine can lead to raised heart disease risk

(The Daily Telegraph)
AURORA, CO - NOVEMBER 20: Karley Workman, 14, examines a healthy snack during the Shapedown program for overweight adolescents and children on November 20, 2010 in Aurora, Colorado. The 10-week family-centered program held by the Denver area Children's Hospital teaches youth and their parents ways to lead a healthier more active lifestyle, as a longer lasting weight-loss alternative to dieting. Nationally, some 15 percent of children are overweight or obese, as are some 60 percent of adults. (Photo by John Moore/Getty Images)

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Being fat aged nine can lead to raised heart disease risk = Fear hastens, as in a greedier bloated kid eating candies!
(by Maurice Goddard)

Tony Blair debates Christopher Hitchens on religion

(BBC)
Former British Prime Minister Tony Blair (L) and author Christopher Hitchens pose ahead of their debate on religion set up by Munk Debates in Toronto, November 26, 2010.  REUTERS/Mark Blinch (CANADA - Tags: RELIGION SOCIETY POLITICS)

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Tony Blair debates Christopher Hitchens on religion = Able atheist pins slithery chronic Brit here, on no God!
(by Maurice Goddard)

Friday, November 26, 2010

The Two Most Essential, Abhorrent, Intolerable Lies Of George W. Bush's Memoir

(Huffington Post)
Former President George W. Bush discusses his memoirs, Decision Points , during a Perspectives in Leadership Forum at The Ronald Reagan Presidential Library in Simi Valley, California on November 18, 2010.  UPI/Jayne Kamin-Oncea Photo via Newscom

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The Two Most Essential, Abhorrent, Intolerable Lies Of George W. Bush's Memoir = Stir here! Let's boo, White House's feeble, megalomania-torn, gormless-born twit!
(by Maurice Goddard)

North Korean artillery hits South Korean island

(BBC)
YEONPYEONG ISLAND, SOUTH KOREA - NOVEMBER 26: Destroyed houses are pictured following artillery exchange between North and South Korea on November 26, 2010 in Yeonpyeong Island, South Korea. South Korean Prime Minister Lee Myung-bak announced the government would increase the number of troops and heavy weapons on the disputed island of Yeonpyeong after dozens of artillery shells fired by North Korea struck the island on November 23, resulting in 4 deaths and further injuries and prompting return fire from South Korean troops. The incident comes amid tensions over North Korea's nuclear program and the announcement of North Korean leader Kim Jong II's youngest son as his successor. (Photo by Chung Sung-Jun/Getty Images)

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North Korean artillery hits South Korean island = Thank the ' irrational & nasty' - kindles Seoul horror
(by Aronas Pinchas)

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South Korean ire at hits = Their honour is at stake
(by Tony Crafter)

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Who Needs Marriage? A Changing Institution

(Time)
A worker put a transfer onto a souvenir mug, made to mark the engagement between Britain's Prince William and Kate Middleton, at Aynsley China in Stoke-on-Trent, central England November 17, 2010. The company has produced mugs and plates as part of a pre-production run prior to full production. The marriage of Prince William to Kate Middleton next year could give a 620 million pound ($985 million) boost to the British economy, retail reseachers Verdict said on Wednesday.  REUTERS/Darren Staples  (BRITAIN - Tags: ENTERTAINMENT SOCIETY ROYALS)

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Who needs marriage? A changing institution = Geriatric nuns do, in "Ah! We imagine that snog!"
(by Maurice Goddard)

If it's Thanksgiving, you must be shopping

(Reuters)
NEW YORK - NOVEMBER 28: Shoppers pass through Rockefeller Center to hunt for bargains the day after Thanksgiving, or 'Black Friday,' on November 28, 2008 in New York City. (Photo by Yana Paskova/Getty Images)
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If it's Thanksgiving, you must be shopping = Thus thinking of massive buying? Stop, pig!
(by Aronas Pinchas)

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Sarah Palin on Glenn Beck's radio show: 'We gotta stand with our North Korean allies'

(New York Daily News)
PHOENIX - NOVEMBER 23: Former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin signs her new book 'America By Heart: Reflections on Family, Faith and Flag' November 23, 2010 in Phoenix, Arizona. Amid speculation about a 2012 White House bid, Palin kicked off a 16-stop tour for the book, which follows her bestselling memoir 'Going Rogue' last year and is billed as a tribute to veterans, hunting and the Tea Party. (Photo by Eric Thayer/Getty Images)

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Sarah Palin on Glenn Beck's radio show: 'We gotta stand with our North Korean allies' = Oops! A well known thing now, alas. A sorrier, loud-arse bonehead, can't think straight!
(by Maurice Goddard)

Obama Pardons Turkeys - but Not People

(CBS News)
U.S. President Barack Obama (2nd L) pardons the National Thanksgiving Turkey next to National Turkey Federation President Yubert Envia (L) in the Rose Garden of the White House in Washington, November 24, 2010. The president's daughters Sasha (2nd R) and Malia (R) watch.  REUTERS/Larry Downing (UNITED STATES - Tags: POLITICS ANIMALS SOCIETY)

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Obama Pardons Turkeys - but Not People = A superb parody, mate! Top bloke's no nut!
(by Maurice Goddard)

John Travolta and Kelly Preston welcome their son, Benjamin

(CNN)
LOS ANGELES, CA - AUGUST 07: Singer Elena Roggero, actress Kelly Preston, actor John Travolta and singer Michele Henderson attend The Church of Scientology Celebrity Centre 41st Anniversary Gala held at the Church of Scientology Celebrity Centre on August 7, 2010 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images for COS)

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John Travolta and Kelly Preston welcome their son, Benjamin = An event's known thrill reaps a jolly moment, and both rejoice!
(by Maurice Goddard)

Fruits and Vegetables May Prolong Your Life

(WebMD)
Various vegetables and fruits, close up

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Fruits and vegetables may prolong your life = Great stuff ! So, I buy more, play and live longer!
(by Aronas Pinchas)

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Fruits and vegetables may prolong your life = Anu Garg so inferred: "I've my potato bellyfuls!"
(by Maurice Goddard)

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Fruits and vegetables may prolong your life = Live purest fully, by doing free anagrams too!
(by Maurice Goddard)

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Royal wedding: Prince William to marry Kate Middleton on Friday April 29, 2011

(The Daily Telegraph)
Britain's Prince William and his fiancee Kate Middleton (L) pose for a photograph in St. James's Palace, central London in a November 16, 2010 file photo. Britain's Prince William is to marry his fiancee Kate Middleton on Friday April 29 next year at London's Westminster Abbey, the 1,000-year-old church where the  funeral was held for his mother Princess Diana.  REUTERS/Suzanne Plunkett/files  (BRITAIN - Tags: SOCIETY ROYALS ENTERTAINMENT PROFILE)

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On April twenty-ninth, two thousand and eleven, in Westminster Abbey, = When Bonny William weds a pretty hotter, suntanned bonniest native!
(by Maurice Goddard)

Monday, November 22, 2010

Pope says in book he would resign if incapacitated

(Reuters)
Pope Benedict XVI waves as he leads the Angelus prayer at the end of a mass to consecrate La Sagrada Familia church as a Basilica in Barcelona November 7, 2010. REUTERS/Albert Gea (SPAIN - Tags: RELIGION)

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Pope says in book he would resign if incapacitated = "I, being one old crock, a fat unhappy dope as I, it's wise."
(by Maurice Goddard)

UK to lend Ireland £7bn

(Financial Times)
Irish Prime Minister Brian Cowen (2nd R) speaks during a news conference on the steps of Government Buildings, in Dublin November 22, 2010. Cowen resisted calls for his resignation on Monday, vowing to stay in power long enough to pass an austerity budget needed for an EU/IMF bailout package, and then call an early election.   REUTERS/Cathal McNaughton  (IRELAND - Tags: BUSINESS POLITICS)

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UK to lend Ireland seven billions = It's real - London even likes Dublin!
(by Aronas Pinchas)

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Hillary Clinton Says She Won't Run Again for Elective Office

(Bloomberg)
U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton (R) gestures while meeting with France's Foreign Affairs Minister Michele Alliot-Marie for bilateral talks at the NATO summit in Lisbon, November 20, 2010. REUTERS/Marcelo del Pozo (PORTUGAL - Tags: POLITICS MILITARY)

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Hillary Clinton says She won't run again for elective office = "I'll choose to live years on in affluence, writing fancy trash!"
(by Maurice Goddard)

St. Louis tops list of most dangerous US cities

(Yahoo! News)
The Old Courthouse was the site of the Dred Scott court case in 1847 and 1850.  The building was built in the 1820s, although there have been many alterations since then.

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Tops list of most dangerous US cities = Imperfect St. Louis's status is no good
(by Adie Pena)

Sarah Palin's 'America by Heart' sure to stir friends - and enemies

(Christian Science Monitor)
ANCHORAGE, AK - OCTOBER 28: Former Republican Vice Presidential candidate Sarah Palin speaks in support of Senatorial candidate Joe Miller at a rally on October 28, 2010 in Anchorage, Alaska. Miller, a Tea Party favorite, is in a tight race with Repbulican incumbant Lisa Murkowsiki, who is running as a write- in candidate for Senate after losing to Miller in the Republican primary. (Photo by John Moore/Getty Images)

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Sarah Palin's 'America by Heart' sure to stir friends - and enemies = A finer sneer is: "Trash!! Primordial batty dame's a sheer nuisance!"
(by Maurice Goddard)

Mark Twain's Autobiography Flying Off the Shelves

(The New York Times)


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Mark Twain's autobiography flying off the shelves = 'A Vast Long Life Of Ink' by Tom Sawyer's high-up father
(by Maurice Goddard)

Friday, November 19, 2010

Royal wedding set to be bank holiday

(The Daily Telegraph)
Mugs commemorating the engagement of Britain's Prince William to Kate Middleton are put into boxes at the Prince William Pottery Company in Liverpool, northern England November 18, 2010. REUTERS/Phil Noble (BRITAIN - Tags: SOCIETY ROYALS)

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Royal wedding set to be bank holiday = Odd? Will, and rosy Kate, in the Abbey go.
(by Maurice Goddard)

Orlando Airport Moves to Ditch TSA Staff

(Newser)
A Transportation Security Administration (TSA) agent conducts a pat down search of passengers arriving for flights at Denver International Airport less than a week away from the Thanksgiving holiday on November 19, 2010 in Denver.   UPI/Gary C. Caskey Photo via Newscom

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Orlando Airport Moves to Ditch TSA Staff = Hats off, MCO! A stand! Avoid terrorist plot
(by Michael Hammond)

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Ahmadinejad warns against foreign interference in Iran's affairs

(Christian Science Monitor)
ITAR-TASS: BAKU, AZARBAIJAN. NOVEMBER 18, 2010. Iran's President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad speaks at a meeting with Russian president. (Photo ITAR-TASS/ Dmitry Astakhov) Photo via Newscom

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Ahmadinejad warns against foreign interference in Iran's affairs = Sin if insane Tehran, again and again, rejects fine order, affirms war
(by Aronas Pinchas)

For Fab Four, a long and winding road to the iTunes Store

(Washington Post)
SAN ANSELMO, CA - NOVEMBER 16: A Beatles song plays on an iPod November 16, 2010 in San Anselmo, California. Apple has struck a deal with the record label EMI and the Beatles' company Apple Corps to sell digital downloads of the legendary rock band's music on iTunes. (Photo Illustration by Justin Sullivan/Getty Images)

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For Fab Four, a long and winding road to the iTunes Store = Fan? Grin or win! I got around, to afford The Beatles' sound!
(by Maurice Goddard)

It's Official: Susan Boyle Now As Big As The Beatles

(Time)
47360, EDINBURGH, SCOTLAND - Thursday November 11, 2010. Susan Boyle signs autographs of her new book 'The Woman I Was Born to Be' for her fans at the Waterstone Bookstore in Edinburgh. Photograph:  Deadline Scotland, PacificCoastNews.com

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It's official: Susan Boyle now as big as The Beatles = A fab, beefy, able, sanguine Scottish soloist wails!
(by Maurice Goddard)

Bush's 'Decision Points' Is A Terrifying Journey Into the Authoritarian Mind

(Huffington Post)
Former U.S. President George W. Bush signs copies of his new memoir Decision Points at a Barnes & Noble in Houston, Texas on November 17, 2010. Hundreds of people lined up for the chance to purchase signed copies of Decision Points at the bookstore.  UPI/Aaron M. Sprecher Photo via Newscom

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Bush's 'Decision Points' is a terrifying journey into the authoritarian mind = Hi! 'Joint Tyrant Decisions', by nuttier, paranoid, heinous, shiftier ignoramus!
(by Maurice Goddard)

Palin says she can beat Obama

(USA Today)
CHARLESTON, WV - OCTOBER 30: Former vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin speaks to supporters of Republican John Raese during a rally for his U.S. Senate campaign October 30, 2010 in Charleston, West Virginia. Raese and West Virginia Gov. Joe Manchin, a Democrat, are embroiled in a hotly-contested race for the seat vacated following the death of Robert C. Byrd. (Photo by Randy Snyder/Getty Images)

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Palin says she can beat Obama = Base: Ah, some typical bananas!
(by Aronas Pinchas)

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Can science prove we're psychic?

(MSNBC)
Gypsy woman with powers

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Can science prove we're psychic? = We chirp: "Creepy cases convince!"
(by Maurice Goddard)

Why gold is a bad investment

(MarketWatch)
Gold Coins

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Why gold is a bad investment = Net-thing was loved by Midas
(by Aronas Pinchas)

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Why gold is a bad investment = Bandits envy the Midas glow!
(by Maurice Goddard)

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Mel Gibson Admits "Slapping" Oksana

(The Superficial)
Hand in hand on the red carpet with controlled smiles and loving exchanges, Mel Gibson and Oksana reveal no signs of the dysfunction and disorder in their relationship. However, recent reports have shed light on the true nature of their relationship, which was shrouded in scandal from it s beginning until it s violent and bitter end. These archived pictures show the couple throughout their  Fame Pictures, Inc

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Mel Gibson admits slapping Oksana = Man's said: Belt? I'm spanking gal...Oops!
(by Aronas Pinchas)

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Mel Gibson admits slapping oksana = "Bliss, pal, means I'm good at spanking!"
(by Maurice Goddard)

World's smallest woman's joy at Guinness award

(The Daily Telegraph)


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World's smallest woman's joy at Guinness award = As adrenal "wows" run, midget's joy wasn't so small!
(by Maurice Goddard)

Prince William and Kate Middleton Are Enagaged!

(People)
Britain's Prince William and his fiancee Kate Middleton pose for a photograph in St. James's Palace, in central London November 16, 2010. Britain's Prince William is to marry his long-term girlfriend Kate Middleton next year, after an on-off courtship lasting nearly a decade, bringing months of speculation about his intentions to an end.  REUTERS/Suzanne Plunkett  (BRITAIN - Tags: SOCIETY ROYALS)

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Prince William engaged to Kate Middleton = Coming, potential wedding - dreamlike tale!
(by Aronas Pinchas)

Monday, November 15, 2010

Passenger Refuses Full Body Scan, the Groin Check

(CBS News)
MANCHESTER, ENGLAND - JANUARY 07: A full body scan image on a computer screen on trial at Manchester Airport on January 7, 2010 in Manchester, England. The scanner x-rays to the depth of 10mm to produce an outline of the person's body which is then used to detect concealed, potentially dangerous objects. The image is then transmitted to a remote security officer who has no visual or verbal contact with the area where the machine is located. The images are deleted and can never be retrieved after the operator closes the window and the passenger is cleared. (Photo by Christopher Furlong/Getty Images)

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Passenger refuses full body scan, the groin check = You can't see his balls, check gruff person's gender!
(by Aronas Pinchas)

Is Bill Clinton the new Mike Tyson? The latest Hangover will tell

(The Guardian)
Former U.S. President Bill Clinton delivers his keynote address at INTI International University in Nilai outside Kuala Lumpur November 12, 2010. REUTERS/Bazuki Muhammad (MALAYSIA - Tags: POLITICS EDUCATION)

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Is Bill Clinton the new Mike Tyson? The latest Hangover will tell = O! I'll list Monica Lewinsky's lover: "The hell-bent gent with talent!"
(by Maurice Goddard)

'Sarah Palin's Alaska': Running for president on reality TV?

(CNN)
CHARLESTON, WV - OCTOBER 30: Former vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin speaks to supporters of Republican John Raese during a rally for his U.S. Senate campaign October 30, 2010 in Charleston, West Virginia. Raese and West Virginia Gov. Joe Manchin, a Democrat, are embroiled in a hotly-contested race for the seat vacated following the death of Robert C. Byrd. (Photo by Randy Snyder/Getty Images)

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'Sarah Palin's Alaska': Running for president on reality TV? = As proven, all-stupid frontier-gal, has rank near insanity!
(by Maurice Goddard)

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Heavens Above: Giant Jesus Finally Finished

(Sky News)
A giant statue of Jesus Christ is seen in Swiebodzin, 110 km (68 miles) west of Poznan, western Poland, November 6, 2010. The statue of Jesus Christ that its builders say will be the largest in the world is rising from a Polish cabbage field and local officials hope it will become a beacon for tourists. To match Reuters Life! POLAND-JESUS/   REUTERS/Kacper Pempel (POLAND - Tags: RELIGION SOCIETY)

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Heavens Above: Giant Jesus Finally Finished = A jolly high, vain deaf naiveness, benefits us?
(by Maurice Goddard)

Cats Beat Dogs In Table Manners

(PC Magazine)
Kitten standing in front of bowl

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Cats beat dogs in table manners = Most darn canines beg at tables!
(by Maurice Goddard)

Paul and Rachel Chandler released by Somali pirates after 388 days

(The Daily Telegraph)
Released British hostages Rachel and Paul Chandler sit at the Presidential palace in Somalia's capital Mogadishu, November 14, 2010. Somali pirates released British couple Paul and Rachel Chandler on Sunday after holding them hostage for more than a year, Somali officials said. Somali pirates kidnapped the retired couple on October 23 last year after hijacking their 38-foot yacht Lynn Rival in the Indian Ocean off Seychelles. REUTERS/Ismail Taxta (SOMALIA - Tags: CRIME LAW SOCIETY POLITICS)

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Paul and Rachel released by the Somalian pirates = Sea tale: A deal buys Chandlers airplane trip home
(by Tony Crafter)

What Alcohol Actually Does to Your Brain and Body

(LifeHacker)
AN ALCOHOL, THYMOL.  THYMOL COLOR ENHANCED

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What Alcohol Actually Does to Your Brain and Body = Tony Blair: "Ah! Oh! Boy! Actually, wonders to a loud cad!"
(by Maurice Goddard)

French Prime Minister Francois Fillon

(Reuters)
French Prime Minister Francois Fillon, seen in this October 26, 2010 file photo, was reappointed November 14, 2010 to his post the day after he offered the resignation of his government. Fillon retains his postion as prime minister in a government reshuffle on Sunday. Photo taken October 26, 2010.  REUTERS/Charles Platiau/Files (FRANCE - Tags: POLITICS HEADSHOT)

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French Prime Minister Francois Fillon = Chief can trim frills in pension reform!
(by Maurice Goddard)

Desire in the Twilight of Life

(The Wall Street Journal)
Senior Couple Reading in Bed

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Desire in the Twilight of Life = High relief, if wet, in "Let's do it!"
(by Maurice Goddard)

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Chinese workers build 15-story hotel in just six days

(Yahoo! News)
2 Cranes Used As Hoisting Apparatus In Construction

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Chinese workers build fifteen-story hotel in just six days = Short, deft job to luxury stylish residences - finis in a week
(by Aronas Pinchas)

Berlusconi at Risk With No-Confidence Motion

(The New York Times)
ITAR-TASS: SEOUL, SOUTH KOREA. NOVEMBER 12, 2010. Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi appears at the G20 Seoul Summit 2010. (Photo ITAR-TASS/ Dmitry Astakhov) Photo via Newscom Photo via Newscom

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Berlusconi at risk with no-confidence motion = First, we boo one dim Latin chicken out in scorn!
(by Maurice Goddard)

Paper plane launched into space captures Earth images

(BBC)
Mountain Surrounded by Clouds

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Paper plane launched into space captures Earth images = Pressmen applaud the technical "Paperaeronautics Age"!
(by Maurice Goddard)

Myanmar frees opposition leader Aung San Suu Kyi

(Los Angeles Times)
Aung San Suu Kyi speaks with supporters after she was released from house arrest in Yangon November 13, 2010. REUTERS/Soe Zeya Tun (MYANMAR - Tags: POLITICS SOCIETY IMAGES OF THE DAY)

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Myanmar frees opposition leader Aung San Suu Kyi = As I imagine, an ultrasupreme day, for one so spunky!
(by Maurice Goddard)